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June 28, 2007 June 28, 2007

Posted by Ric in Aries, Cancer, Capricorn, Earth, Gemini, Horoscope, Leo, Libra, Planet X, Sagittarius, Taurus, Today's Horoscope, Virgo.

Jupiter plunges Gemini. Fourteen old people will get lost in the Rocky Mountains. They will be rescued by a kind bear, who will lead them out of the wilderness, except for the one who insists on being called Senior Citizen. That one will be eaten as a fee for the rescue.

Saturn atones Pluto in Scorpio. You will have to pay the price for that wild sexual fling you had last week with the twenty-one-year-old student. She’ll bill you.

Planet X connubilates Sagittarius. A stranger will move into your town. He has lots of weapons. He is a kind man. You’ll never see him until… well, don’t worry about it until next March.

Comet Y disturbs asteroid belt. Oh, we’re gonna get pounded this afternoon at 5:13. Kiss your BMW goodbye.



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