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June 22, 2007 June 22, 2007

Posted by Ric in Aries, Cancer, Capricorn, Earth, Gemini, Horoscope, Leo, Libra, Planet X, Sagittarius, Scorpio, Taurus, Today's Horoscope, Virgo.
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Pluto leaves orbit. Pluto will smash into the Sears Repair Center sometime today or tomorrow. Nobody will miss them.

Judy and Tom, influenced by a large plastic model of Jupiter, will meet up with Mary and Riley, with whom they will not have wild sex nor will they share drinks or dinner. In fact there’s no reason for them to do anything together. Jupiterian plastic just doesn’t make it anymore.

Saturn in annoyance with The Sun. Sears will suffer a financial setback, throwing thousands out of work, but the officers will get nice, fat severance checks.

Mars and Jupiter balance with Venus. Today’s disaster cancelled, unless you count thousands of Kenmore refrigerators failing simultaneously and crying out pitifully for help from Sears Repair Center, help which never arrives. The smell of rotting food sickens millions of people, who flood hospital emergency rooms, overwhelming the healthcare system, and leading to a crash of the financial system, and the sacking and looting of Washington, followed by a mass drowning of politicians in the Reflecting Pool.

It could happen.

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