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June 13, 2007 June 13, 2007

Posted by Ric in Horoscope, Today's Horoscope.
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A medical receptionist, skilled at ignoring patients, in New England, possibly southern New England, will be struck by a shard from Jupiter and spend the rest of her life in a large specimen jar in a museum basement.

A collision of two small Saturnian moons will alter the path of Planet X. Baseball players taking steroids in America will suffer a reaction. The Commissioner will be castigated for his inaction.

Morgan, attempting to speak Italian to an Iranian woman, will be stoned. His drug abuse sentence will keep him out of Iran and Italy for thirteen years, until Neptune once again favors Deimos and Phobos in an unusual configuration.

Uranus conflates Pluto. The lost Pacific continent of Lemuria will surface at 12:03 this afternoon. Many fish will die. A nuclear submarine, armed with Trident missiles, will be caught in the violent upheaval and its missiles will discharge into Lemuria, causing it to sink once more. The resulting tsunamis will kill everybody living on the coast of the Pacific Ocean.

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