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June 5, 2007 June 5, 2007

Posted by Ric in Horoscope, Today's Horoscope.

Friends will question your judgment about the two strippers today. Hear them out, but realize they are acting out of jealousy. Offer to share.

Melvin’s wife and Melvin’s sister will meet at the supermarket south of the freeway this afternoon. They will trade notes and both will decide on divorce. Melvin will go to a strip club for solace.

An important person in the self-improvement industry will announce a new invention designed to reduce stress, remove fat, and toughen up the muscles with no exercise. During the rollout demonstration he will be struck by lightning and as a result convert to Buddhism, destroy his invention, and live in a cave in the Himalayas.

A volcano will begin to erupt in downtown Omaha at 4:12 this afternoon, seriously disrupting rush hour traffic. The entire town will be engulfed within a week. In ten years Omaha will be as popular as Pompeii.



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